May 11th, 2009
I started offering freelance software development services out of necessity. As a cash-strapped student, I’m always looking for fast, easy ways to make an extra buck. Roughly 6 months ago, while a few friends and I discussed how to increase our incomes with the occasional one-time project, Elance was brought up. Unbeknown to me, the site was a focal point for freelance activities on the web. After reviewing a few profiles, the site’s paying policies and the cost of the cheapest subscription, I signed up. My goal was to offer my Java and PHP skills to as many clients as possible. I was vying for some of those top dollars PHP developers were pulling in. As it’s often the case though, reality sank in fast.
4 days and 14 unsuccessful bids later, I realized this was not going to be easy. I also noticed something else was not entirely right. The way buyers and providers interacted most of the time seemed unconventional. Fortunately, it hit me soon enough. I came up with the following list 6 months after using the site with just a handful of successes. These are the contradictions that would make you utter profanities at a rate you never thought possible. They defy all logic and reasoning. Yet, one can find stuff like this daily at Elance. I call these peculiar inconsistencies in common sense the Incongruous Triad.
Experts = cheap labor
I’ve always thought of experts in any field as the personification of greatness. An expert is so good at what he/she does that it pretty much leaves the rest of us mere mortals looking mentally handicapped if we dare to emulate them. Expertise doesn’t come smoothly though. Dedication, patience and lots of hard work are a must if you aspire to transcend the barrier of mere competency. Naturally, one would be compelled to think expertise is anything but cheap, right? Well, apparently, that is not the case:

This buyer wants an expert in IT (whatever that means) to go through his code base and perform the outlined tasks. The “extreme complexity” of the project should not dissuade potential bidders. Oh, the buyer also wants the work to be performed immediately. All that for LESS than 500 bucks! Did I just teleport myself into Bizarro World?
Underselling yourself is beneficial to you
I find the prospect of charging 50 dollars for a project hard to fathom. Even if one’s costs are nearly zero (and they just can’t be), 50 bucks is a preposterous figure. Furthermore, Elance charges 8.75% of all the money you’re paid for a project. So, to be precise, we’re talking about 45.63 dollars. Hold onto that figure while we try to make sense out of the following project’s bids:

It seems that the best way to bid for a project is to charge virtually nothing. Who do you think is most likely to get the project? The developer charging 24,000 dollars or the one charging 50? You’re free to scratch your head now.
Unintelligible and pointless project descriptions are uber-awesome
The importance of requirements gathering cannot be emphasized enough. Anyone who’s ever done any software development at any level would rightly concede that the most difficult thing in the world is knowing WHAT to do. The HOW is just a matter of planning, coding and deployment; then the proverbial repeat, repeat, repeat, ad infinitum. Nevertheless, regardless of this “common knowledge”, gems such as this one appear more often than not:

The title for this posting was PHP programmer needed for system changes. No, your eyes are not deceiving you. You read it right. This buyer wants a PHP programmer to do some, er, system changes? System changes?! What is that supposed to mean? What IS a system change? How can you characterize a system change? Are we talking about scripts running as cron jobs periodically? Are we talking about PHP libraries used by aforementioned cron jobs? Are we talking about different scripts altogether? Did he mean something else rather than PHP? What’s the context here? What in the world is a system change?!
That’s not THE most interesting part though. Whatever it is you consider the most wonderful thing in the world is unequivocally outshone by this simple fact: this project had 2 bids already! Let’s put that in perspective. What do those bids mean? Well, it essentially means 2 developers read the buyer’s mind and KNEW, ostensibly a priori, WHAT to do and HOW, while also inferring out of thin air how much to charge. It’s all simply beyond me.
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You can rightfully claim situations like these are only abundant on sites such as Elance, where the bidding nature of the site favors the buyers greatly. That could well be the case. However, when it comes to software development services, the reality is freelance work is hardly free of difficulties. I would highly recommend the activity to anyone looking to earn the sporadic extra buck. Nevertheless, I wouldn’t quit my regular job in hopes of instant freedom.
If you have your own bizarre experiences from your forays into the freelance world, please do share. I’m always up for a good laugh.
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